sooo...

I love him.
That is all.

Are you sure you want to delete?

Yeahh I know I just posted, but this is important to me.

I just deleted all of my previous posts, just because I feel like their nonsense. Not a place where I want to be anymore. When I hit delete I got a message saying "Are you sure you want to delete? This can NOT be undone."

Yes.

I never have to go to that place again...

THANK God.

Boys are like Buses...

I feel the need to start over.

I'm going through a "self renovation." This last year and a half has been a whirlwind of drama and bull. Now I'm out here and it's like, I still can't rid myself of the bullshit. It's crazy. Some people use aliases and shit on here, but I say hey, it's my blog, so I'm gonna keep it 100 real (thanks Kai, lol).

Firstly,
I have FINALLY de-duked myself. I told Terrance once and for all that I didn't want to talk to him anymore. As expected, he is taking it and flipping it to make him look like he is so big blah blah blah. But I know he is hurting. Oh well. I hate to think that there is a such thing as a "social ladder" but there definitely is, and he is a couple notches below me. I can't deal.

Then Jeff and his bullshit. Situations like this make me glad to have listened to the men in my life. I just hate how he can tell me that he can see himself with me, blah blah, but yet he lives with another girl. AND he tells her the same thing, but denies her to me. I'm not dumb. It's so funny, but sad at the same time. Like, she calls him her love and all this other BS on her tweets and shit, but he tells me in all caps (online, lol) that she is not his girl. Hilarious. Like I really want him anyway. He got FIRED from WENDYS for STEALING CHICKEN. Get real.

Anything else...hmm...Well I hate how dudes try to have halfway relationships. i went alog with the shit for awhile but now I'm like fuck it. Commit or Forget (thanks J-Mitch). Don't tell me you don't want me talking/hangingout/etc with other girls if you're not willing to be with me. I mean, what is that? A big contradiction I think.

I think thats the jist of all the bullshit that tries to wear me out. I won't let it though.

Yo...fotki is the shit.

And this is also the shit. There is more out there then just facebook/myspace folks. (thanks Mariah.)



Yo, I'm getting more respect for T.Taylor. Real shit.

Chris and Niqua went back today. I really appreciate them visiting. We had a really good time :)



I wish I could be more consistent. I like blogging and whatnot, but for some reason I keep putting it up and putting it down. Ugh..

I'm so at peace right now. Just sitting in MY house, listening to MY cable tv. Tyanna Taylor is on the ustream. While I think she is kinda stepping out of her realm by givin people advice on life, some real shit is being said. I can't wait for this video to finish downloading so I can check it out.

This hair needs to fucking grow. Geesh.

Until next time loves...

fin.

Some Other Beginnings End...

So Virginia is my end...
and Arizona is my new beginning.
...or is it? I swear this transition has been so bittersweet. I can't tell which has the higher levels. I love the city, the scenery, and my job. But I'm lonely as FUCK. I feel like I know nobody, have no one to turn to...it's just hard. And I was told it was gonna be hard. But I kinda psyched myself out to not think about it. Hopefully things get better soon, because I just may be suicidal in a week. I've never thought I've been good at making friends. Everyone calls me a social butterfly, but I don't see it. I think I'm socially awkward. I've been trying to step out of the box to connect with people here but so far it's gone nowhere. But then again, I've only been here a week, maybe if I keep telling myself that things will get easier. Ugh...